One issue nearly all high school teachers face is students who are excessively worried about their grades. To be sure, the student that doesn’t care about their grades presents a more worrisome dilemma, but that does not make the ‘grade grubber’ student any less real or frustrating. As a teacher, when I talk to this young person I hope to convey the idea that the process is more important than the result. I also attempt to convince them that getting a B in an AP class in high school is not the end of the world. I always add that this grade they are worried about iis something they likely won’t think about once they’re out of high school. Like, ever. Sometimes my arguments ease the student’s worry, but I suspect most often my words don’t do all that much good.

A related problem arises when a student who has high A continues to stress out about their grade. This type of student typically has the habits to maintain their success. The quote below, from a 2024 book by Jennifer Breheny Wallace about the dangers of ‘achievement culture’ in America, makes an important point about this type of student that I strongly agree with. Put simply, a meaningful adolescence should involve more than just academic performance. Indeed, thinking back now on my high school experience–many years ago, that is true-–I remember hardly anything about the academic nature of my experience, including specific grades. What I do remember are my friendships, playing football, cutting class on Wednesdays during senior year to drive to Oakland to catch Oakland A’s day games in the bleachers (for something like $5!), and the other emotional highs and lows of my particular experience in the late 80s in a small college town in Northern California. I recognize in hindsight that earning decent grades (I was a straight B student) helped me get into college. However, the grades and their meaning faded quickly.

It is worth noting that our current system is organized in a way that promotes student worries about grades. That is a whole other topic that I will refrain from getting into, but I do think is important not to forget.

Today, I hope my students, as well as my daughter, will approach high school with the wisdom to discern that while grades matter, so do relationships, extra-curricular activities, travel (if one is so lucky), and the pursuit of other interests in the margins of the high school experience. Of course, students today have additional pressures caused by phones and social media that I didn’t have to deal with in the ‘80s. Nevertheless, it’s a critical balance; and while it is hard to nail it, having a well rounded experience in high school is worth the effort. Wallace nails this idea with these 12 words.