Missives from Samsara

I treated myself today to a long browse at Powell’s downtown. I walked out with two books, neither of which I had on my radar going in. I noticed after I left that the two books had a something in common: They are both books about American intellectuals who at various times in their lives took positions that didn’t align with their initial ideologies. In the case of education expert Diana Ravitch, her views morphed from conservative to liberal over her adulthood. In the case of Hitchens, who is one of my real intellectual heroes, he was a loud supporter of America’s war in Iraq, despite his position leading up to the war as a staunch leftist. He didn’t become a conservative, but he took a controversial position that rankled many on the Left that previously tended to agree with him.

New York City made history yesterday electing immigrant politician Zohran Mamdani as their new mayor. It got me thinking about New York, which is a city I love and have been fortunate to visit many times (and will soon be visiting again). Then this morning, the quote below appeared in my daily Readwise email. The quote is from The Weirdest People in the World by professor Joseph Henrich. The quote notes the fact that big, beautiful, diverse cities like New York are more innovative than the sum of their parts. I think many of us intuit this, but in the book Henrich explains the research and the logic. However, innovation isn’t the reason I love places like New York, but it is adjacent to what I love–the vibrancy, the opportunity for serendipity, the randomness, the deep layers of culture, and the variety of experiences available.

These admirable and enjoyable elements of modern urban life contrast vividly in my mind with what I see when I drive through rural America. I’m always shocked by how depressed and poor rural America feels. Small town America just gives off defeated vibes to me. I don’t mean to insult people who live in rural places. I’m only expressing my reaction when passing through and I am certainly not condemning or criticizing people who prefer to live in rural areas. To each his own.

Nevertheless, the point Henrich makes with this quote, and in his book generally, is that cities drive innovation and progress. As a fan of diverse, electric places like New York City, I’m not surprised.

This research makes a few points that are interesting, relevant, yet slightly counterintuitive. According to this article, by Complexity Science Hub Vienna, the number of close friends people have has increased over the past fifteen years (starting between 2008 and 2010). This coincides with the rise of smart phones and social media. However, political polarization has also increased. According to the article, those consistently expressing liberal views rose from 14% to 31%, while those holding conservative views increased from 6% to 16%. The researchers explain that since most people have more close friends, they are more likely to cut ties with one who has different political beliefs then they do. That means more of us have friend groups that see the world they way we do politically. In other words, there are less ‘bridge friends’ who help expose us to different viewpoints. The end result is less dialogue and more breakdown of our democracy, both of which are becoming enormously dangerous at present.

Another interesting angle has to do with Dunbar’s number, which suggests we can only maintain about 150 meaningful relationships, with roughly 5 close friends in our innermost circle. This research shows we went from 2 close friends to 4-5 around 2008-2010—so we’re actually approaching the upper limit of what Dunbar predicted for our intimate circle.

Thus, it can be said we are not exceeding our cognitive capacity for friendships; we’re just filling it differently. Social media didn’t give us superhuman social abilities. Rather, it made it easier to maintain more connections within our natural limits. But here’s the problem: when you’re at capacity with like-minded friends who are easy to maintain online, there’s no room (or motivation) for the harder work of bridging divides with people who think differently.

In other words, Dunbar’s Law explains why the doubling of close friends leads to polarization: we’ve hit our cognitive ceiling, so we’re now optimizing for similarity and comfort rather than diversity. Our social “budget” is maxed out on echo chambers.

There is a lot of scary realities about America right now. Here are a few such examples.

1. Approximately 42 million people need SNAP benefits to help them get through the month.

2. Roughly 34% of U.S. fourth graders cannot read at a basic level, and gaps between low-income and high-income students are widening (National Assessment of Educational Progress, 2023).

3. The richest 10% of Americans own nearly 70% of all wealth, while the bottom half collectively holds just 2.6% (Federal Reserve), 2023). That’s the widest gap since the Great Depression.

4. The U.S. has experienced over 600 mass shootings each year since 2020, averaging almost two per day (Gun Violence Archive, 2024). Firearms are now the leading cause of death for children in America.

5. Nearly one in three teens report poor mental health most of the time, and suicide is now the second leading cause of death for people ages 10–24 (CDC, 2023)

Here is my current reading stack. Most recently started books towards the top, slogs at the bottom. I finished five books this month, all of which I enjoyed. However, a few of my current reads are languishing. For instance, I don’t think I picked up Zuboff’s book more than once this month. I am also not digging into the textbook I started at the end of the summer (not pictured here). This is pretty typical for me though. I dip into four or five books every day and two or three are read every day and allow me to make progress much faster. The Birth of the Modern is a doorstopper and has been sitting on my bookshelf since the 90s, when I got the book off the remainder table at Tower Books. So far I am really enjoying it and I suspect I’ll be done with it early in the new year. The Stanley McChrystal and Ryan Holiday books go well together and I am enjoying them both. However, The Rediscovery of America is a slog and is not as good as I’d hoped. Unlike the Zuboff book though, I am committed to finishing it.

I get emails from Readwise every morning that share quotes I’ve saved while reading. I’ve written about Readwise before and it remains one of my favorite tech subscriptions. I can ‘favorite’ quotes and then on Sundays I get those special quotes sent to me, so I end up seeing them more frequently. Below are a few of my Sunday Favorites, which I was reminded of today.

This quote by psychologist Jonathan Haidt expresses an argument for reading that I agree with. If I’ve picked my reads well there are many ideas that give me pause and help me understand both the world and my own views. Every once in a while, books themselves–in their entirety–permanently rearrange the mental structures in my mind. For me, those powerful books include: 1. The Lord of the Rings 2. Eknath Easwaren’s The Dhammapada 3. The Hays translation of Meditations by Marcus Aurelius 4. The Social Construction of Reality by Peter Berger. Ken Wilber’s books, especially A Brief History of Everything, The Marriage of Sense and Soul, One Taste, and Up From Eden were also seminal and profound.

I am sharing this not because I have this practice nailed, but because I need to be reminded of it. The little voice in my head is quick to judge, both others and myself. Indeed, it’s like I have a freakin' arrogant know-it-all camped out in my cranium that defaults to criticism and judgement whenever it apprehends something. I suspect this is true for a lot of people. I notice is most when I’m driving. I have gotten better at noticing it, so I’ll take that as a victory. I am hoping that moving forward I get better at taking Derek Sivers’s advice and slow down the automatic reactions in order to give myself both more time to think and more time to react without anger or judgement. Sivers' blog is amazing, btw.

As we get into the latter half of October, that means it is almost time to vote. Most of us don’t have major seats (Governor, House or Senate, for instance) on the ballot. However, these off year elections often have important local issues that we should weigh in on. It is also time to work our voting muscles. In the last presidential election, ‘didn’t vote’ actually beat the two major party candidates. That is abhorrent to me. Even if the stakes seem low, we need to get out there and have our say.